So, I tried posting something the other day, but I got a bit distracted and...well...yeah. It's been an amazing three weeks and I am both excited and heart-broken that I leave in just 9 days!
Being here has been an interesting experience to say the least. In fact, I have actually been feeling pretty indifferent towards everything and that is absolutely terrifying to me. I mean, I should at least be feeling something...right? I had still not even cried yet for these beautiful children who are without mothers and fathers. This is the reason that I came here...to have my eyes opened and my heart broken for God's precious kids.
I finally understood, after spending 2 hours on the phone rambling on about what I just couldn't figure out (thanks for being so patient Kevin). After 2 1/2 weeks of indifference and complacency on the outside, I realized that I was actually angry with God. I mean, it's one thing to talk about how God has a plan for these kids and that we should love them the way that He does. But after getting to know these awesome children and putting so many beautiful names and faces into the category of "fatherless", I just could not help questioning God's hand in all of this.
It is extremely frustrating to be angry with God when I came here to Bolivia in pursuit of His will and to worship Him. Yet my mind continually returns to James 1:27 which says "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress..." I still don't understand why God would allow so many children to live in this world without knowing the loving caress of their mother's touch or the proud look in their father's eyes, and yet I am so incredibly blessed to know both. Life just does not make sense. But, I do know this: God's heart breaks infinitely more than mine ever could for these incredible children and His desire is that they would take refuge in His unfailing love, knowing that they are His and He is theirs.
Needless to say, I finally cried last night for the first time since arriving here in Cochabamba and I am sure that it is not the last time either. Please pray for the wonderful children of Casa de Amor, they need families, they need stability and security, they need love, but most of all, they need Jesus.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Greetings from Bolivia!
Buenos tardes, queridos!
Wow, so it has been about a week since my last post and I have so much to say and so little time to say it! I am going to my first Bolivian soccer game in a bit!
I arrived in Cochabamba, Bolivia on Monday after over 24 hours of travelling/waiting in airports! It has been an incredible experience being here almost one week. First of all, being almost completely immersed in the Spanish language and Bolivian culture has been awesome! I have been here less than a week and already my Spanish has improved so much. I am now finding myself thinking in Spanish rather than English!
I have been kept busy these past several days and haven't had time to be too homesick, although I am starting to feel it now. I have worked at the orphanage for several days, gone for a hike with the Director and her family and have just gotten to know the adorable children and wonderful "tias" or house mothers and other volunteers. I have not had very many opportunities to take pictures as I have just been taking everything in for the first time.
I will be working mostly at the baby home which is composed of around 18? babies ranging in age from 3 months to 2 years! They are so adorable but also quite a handful to keep up with as they are constantly testing the new volunteers! Oh yeah, and the diapers too...oh the diapers... It is a good thing that they are so cute! I am living in a guest house behind the second house where 15 children live, ranging in age from 3 up to 11 years old. These children are absolutely wonderful and it is so much fun getting to have little conversations with them in Spanish and just hang out with them during my time off! Many of their stories are traumatic ones, as they were either abandoned or taken away from their mothers who were incapable of caring for them (either prostitutes, homeless, alcoholics or drug addicts). These children are well-loved for sure in this home though, as the tias are great with them and really have genuine compassion and love for the children. And although they have a beautiful home and are well cared for, it is obvious that they are desperate for their mommies and daddies, especially male figures in the boys' lives as their are no "tios" and only a few male volunteers.
My head is swimming right now with all that I have been witnessing, hearing and learning and I am really struggling to put into words the incredible amount of emotion that is welling up inside of me. Last night I had to write a composition about my initial reactions about being here for my independent study. Did I mention it had to be in Spanish. Ay! Talk about being unable to actually express myself! I am hoping that this will not be the case when I return home though! I look forward to sharing more with you in the near future...although I am not sure of the next time I will have the opportunity to actually sit down and post something!
Until then, ciao!
Wow, so it has been about a week since my last post and I have so much to say and so little time to say it! I am going to my first Bolivian soccer game in a bit!
I arrived in Cochabamba, Bolivia on Monday after over 24 hours of travelling/waiting in airports! It has been an incredible experience being here almost one week. First of all, being almost completely immersed in the Spanish language and Bolivian culture has been awesome! I have been here less than a week and already my Spanish has improved so much. I am now finding myself thinking in Spanish rather than English!
I have been kept busy these past several days and haven't had time to be too homesick, although I am starting to feel it now. I have worked at the orphanage for several days, gone for a hike with the Director and her family and have just gotten to know the adorable children and wonderful "tias" or house mothers and other volunteers. I have not had very many opportunities to take pictures as I have just been taking everything in for the first time.
I will be working mostly at the baby home which is composed of around 18? babies ranging in age from 3 months to 2 years! They are so adorable but also quite a handful to keep up with as they are constantly testing the new volunteers! Oh yeah, and the diapers too...oh the diapers... It is a good thing that they are so cute! I am living in a guest house behind the second house where 15 children live, ranging in age from 3 up to 11 years old. These children are absolutely wonderful and it is so much fun getting to have little conversations with them in Spanish and just hang out with them during my time off! Many of their stories are traumatic ones, as they were either abandoned or taken away from their mothers who were incapable of caring for them (either prostitutes, homeless, alcoholics or drug addicts). These children are well-loved for sure in this home though, as the tias are great with them and really have genuine compassion and love for the children. And although they have a beautiful home and are well cared for, it is obvious that they are desperate for their mommies and daddies, especially male figures in the boys' lives as their are no "tios" and only a few male volunteers.
My head is swimming right now with all that I have been witnessing, hearing and learning and I am really struggling to put into words the incredible amount of emotion that is welling up inside of me. Last night I had to write a composition about my initial reactions about being here for my independent study. Did I mention it had to be in Spanish. Ay! Talk about being unable to actually express myself! I am hoping that this will not be the case when I return home though! I look forward to sharing more with you in the near future...although I am not sure of the next time I will have the opportunity to actually sit down and post something!
Until then, ciao!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
I <3 sudden changes of plans!!!!
Seriously, I really do! It reminds me just how little control I have in my own life. It also lets me rely upon God's understanding and plans, knowing that "in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28). Talk about being faithful!!
Right, so remember how I promised that I would have a great story of how God would take care of my cancelled flight...well, so far my flight has been rescheduled for this Sunday instead of tomorrow (talk about short notice) and the airline is working out all the details for me as well as paying for any expenses incurred for cancelling my flight from NY to Miami! I am pretty certain that God is teaching me to be patient and flexible through all of this as I am super-anxious to just be holding all of those precious children!!! I am also pretty certain that this story is nowhere near being finished...can't wait to see what comes next!
Right, so remember how I promised that I would have a great story of how God would take care of my cancelled flight...well, so far my flight has been rescheduled for this Sunday instead of tomorrow (talk about short notice) and the airline is working out all the details for me as well as paying for any expenses incurred for cancelling my flight from NY to Miami! I am pretty certain that God is teaching me to be patient and flexible through all of this as I am super-anxious to just be holding all of those precious children!!! I am also pretty certain that this story is nowhere near being finished...can't wait to see what comes next!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
My First Post
First of all, I guess I should warn everyone that I am not good at functioning properly with computers.
I started this blog as a sort of journal while in Bolivia. Yes, Bolivia. I leave tomorrow....yikes! I am volunteering at an orphanage for a month in the 3rd largest city in Bolivia; Cochabamba. I will get to hold, feed, change, bathe, clothe, sing to and love orphaned children ranging in age from as young as one month old to around 5 years old. And let me just tell you, I am so excited to be blessed with the opportunity to be the hands and feet of Jesus for the precious children in Bolivia!
It has been a pretty incredible journey...and I haven't even gotten there yet!! Let me just say that it hasn't exactly been the smoothest process...
...let's see...my school would not consider giving me credit for an independent study in my Hispanic Studies major while there--yet, God came through in His perfect timing--the last day of classes at the end of a final I was told that I would be allowed to do it...
...bought the plane tickets about 3 weeks ago and was freaking out because I didn't actually have the money to go---as of right now, after the support of numerous friends and family, God has provided me with more than what I originally aimed for!! (excited to buy lots of shoes for the children at the orphanage with all the extra money!!) ...
...my flight from Miami to Bolivia was cancelled last week, conveniently enough (or not)--nothing has been figured out yet and I leave very shortly (like, tomorrow)--and because of the way that God has been faithful, I cannot help but to have peace and not be worried about it; He is always faithful as I am noticing more and more these days!!
Needless to say, it has been an interesting few weeks to say the least as I prepare to leave...if this is how God works to teach me and change my heart, I can't wait to see what He has planned for me when I finally get there! I am hoping that I will be able to write on this at least every other day while I am there, but we shall see!! I look forward to telling about how God worked out the airline ticket mess...I'm willing to bet it will be pretty awesome!
I started this blog as a sort of journal while in Bolivia. Yes, Bolivia. I leave tomorrow....yikes! I am volunteering at an orphanage for a month in the 3rd largest city in Bolivia; Cochabamba. I will get to hold, feed, change, bathe, clothe, sing to and love orphaned children ranging in age from as young as one month old to around 5 years old. And let me just tell you, I am so excited to be blessed with the opportunity to be the hands and feet of Jesus for the precious children in Bolivia!
It has been a pretty incredible journey...and I haven't even gotten there yet!! Let me just say that it hasn't exactly been the smoothest process...
...let's see...my school would not consider giving me credit for an independent study in my Hispanic Studies major while there--yet, God came through in His perfect timing--the last day of classes at the end of a final I was told that I would be allowed to do it...
...bought the plane tickets about 3 weeks ago and was freaking out because I didn't actually have the money to go---as of right now, after the support of numerous friends and family, God has provided me with more than what I originally aimed for!! (excited to buy lots of shoes for the children at the orphanage with all the extra money!!) ...
...my flight from Miami to Bolivia was cancelled last week, conveniently enough (or not)--nothing has been figured out yet and I leave very shortly (like, tomorrow)--and because of the way that God has been faithful, I cannot help but to have peace and not be worried about it; He is always faithful as I am noticing more and more these days!!
Needless to say, it has been an interesting few weeks to say the least as I prepare to leave...if this is how God works to teach me and change my heart, I can't wait to see what He has planned for me when I finally get there! I am hoping that I will be able to write on this at least every other day while I am there, but we shall see!! I look forward to telling about how God worked out the airline ticket mess...I'm willing to bet it will be pretty awesome!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
